Crazy Girls

What is it?

The longest running topless burlesque show in Las Vegas.

Where is it?

In the Sin City Theater in Planet Hollywood on the Center Strip.

Is it worth the cost?

Are any topless shows worth the cost? If your answer to that is yes, then sure, why not?

Why should I see this show?

Because it’s sort of a Vegas rite of passage.

What else do I need to know?

The ushers/bouncers are not kidding around. Don’t mess with the girls.

What’s the bottom line?

There must be a reason for this show running for nearly 30 years.

It’s hard to believe but Crazy Girls has been playing in Las Vegas for almost 30 years, most of that time at The Riviera and now at Planet Hollywood. It’s a Vegas institution in a lot of ways – the blueprint upon which other topless shows patterned themselves and the subject of many a souvenir photo as people posed with the bronze statue honoring the dancers’, um, “assets.”

The show is pretty much exactly what you’d expect it to be with pretty girls dancing their way through some sort of male fantasy sequence (country western cowgirls, leather wearing dominatrixes, a naughty teacher) that end with them taking off their tops. There’s nothing that breaks new ground or differentiates this show from any of the other topless shows in town until you realize that they were probably doing all of this stuff first.

Most of the numbers are fine but not terribly memorable but a few stand out. The aforementioned bondage routine set to Nine Inch Nails’ “Closer” is edgier than what you’ll usually find in a Vegas topless show while a solo strip tease set to Eartha Kitt’s live version of “How Could You Believe Me?” is cheeky fun (pun intended).

The dancing is solid throughout ranging from burlesque to bump and grind, although it should come as no surprise that I was probably the only person in the audience there to critique their fancy footwork.

Of course it’s the women and they are all beautiful if a bit homogenous. Don’t expect a huge amount of diversity here – they go out of their way to make them all look kind of the same, often using blonde wigs to create a unified front.

There are a few odd moments. The (overly long) opening video introduction is set to Vertical Horizon’s “Everything You Want,” which sounds like a good song to use if you don’t listen to the lyrics which include “But she means nothing to you and you don’t know why” as its primary hook. And of course the trademark giant phallus that shoots streamers into the audience is as silly as it sounds.

Interestingly the original giant phallus got stolen when the show relocated to Planet Hollywood. I still hope whoever stole it turned it into a coffee table.

The traditional showgirl extravaganzas like “Jubilee!,” “Folies,” and “Enter the Night” are mostly gone and forgotten,, leaving shows like this one to carry the mantle of “classic” Vegas topless production. There are several in town so what would make you choose this one? Three decades of breasts can’t be wrong.